A Saddam Obituary

Saddam Hussein (28 April 1937 – 30 December 2006).
We in the Arab World have been blessed with some of the bloodiest meanest dictators. Yesterday we lost one of the greatest of them all. Saddam Hussein was 69, but he looked pretty good for his age. He came from a family of long livers (for him that meant his liver was a 120 cm long). A few years ago he could be seen not very far from where he died, watching military parades and giving out medals to a bunch of cronies who managed to kiss and lick deeper up his back passage. Some said that Saddam was a brutal, blood thirsty, vein, moustached bastard who never got a decent education, but he tried to pass himself off as the Arab world’s leading nationalist figure. Under his guidance, Iraq turned from one of the richest and most prosperous Arab countries into one of the most fucked up. He died yesterday after suffering a neck injury. Another one bites the dust. Wishing you all a happy and hysterical new year.

Really Horrible

Ready for this? Video of the Saddam execution. All of it. It was recorded on a mobile phone by one of the witnesses at the execution. Warning: very graphic images!

It starts with Saddam standing on the gallows and the noose being placed around his neck. What was very disturbing to me is that you could hear voices saying long live Moqtada Al Sadr (the infamous Shiaa leader)and voices shouting: "Go to hell". Saddam then laughs and mocks them saying: "Is this bravey and manhood?" and he adds: "The gallows of shame." A voice pleads to these assholes to shut up, he says: "Please stop. The man is being executed" .Then someone shouts out the name of Muhammad Baqir Al Sadr, the father in law of Muqtada Al Sadr, who was tortured and executed by Saddam. Saddam says his final prayer and he started saying it again, but half way through it, the trap door opens and Saddam hangs. The camera goes shaky and you could hear people cheering and shouting: "the tyrant has fallen". For a split second the camera catches Saddam and his neck looks very dislocated.

I think it is very very low and barbaric to taunt a man moments before his execution. Yes Saddam was a brutal murderer. He is one of the worst human beings that ever walked on the face of the earth, but doing this to him is just so cruel.

Saddam is dead

He was executed at 6:10 in the morning (Baghdad time). I think it was very canny to execute him on Eid day and I hope Iraqis avoid any violent backlash. This must be a good day for the families and friends of all the people that he killed and tortured.

Saddam was probably weighed the day before the execution, to determine the length of drop necessary to ensure a quick death. If the rope was too long, he could have been decapitated, and if it was too short, the strangulation could have taken as long as 45 minutes. Immediately before the execution, Saddam's hands and legs were secured, and the noose was placed around his neck, with the knot behind the left ear (he refused to be blind folded. The execution took place when a trap-door was opened and Saddam fell through. Ideally, Saddam's body weight should cause a rapid fracture-dislocation of the neck. a Quik death but not instantaneous. If Saddam had strong neck muscles or if the 'drop' was too short, or the noose was wrongly positioned, the fracture-dislocation would not have been rapid and death would have resulted from slow asphyxiation. Had this occured, then Saddam's face would have been engorged, the tongue protruded, the eyes would have popped, the body defecated, and violent movements of the limbs would have occured.

According to news reports, Saddam was lucky. He died quickly. This is what happened.

Any time now

Saddam Hussein will be hanging from a rope very soon. He was a very very nasty SOB no doubt about that, but personally I don't approve of the death penalty.

The Story Of Modern Islamic Fundamentalism

Once upon a time a few decades ago Mr. Dictatorship married Miss Opression and soon after, they gave birth to a bunch of bouncing fundamentalist groups. Ofcoarse non of these groups had any clear thought of their own and like all other babies they turned out to be nothing but an endless source of puke and excrement...

Holme added: You forgot about the grandfather Mr. Hitler;)

In a true interactive spirit, please feel free to add to or continue the story :)

MB's need to put some fun into fundamentalism

Looking at the images of the Azhar Muslim Brothers infamous paramilitary parade, I realized that they need urgent help. I am not worried about them going down the path of suicide bombings. What they commited in that show was fashion suicide. Balaclavas are so uncool and the black outfits are too dull. If they want more popularity, then I suggest that in their future marches, they go for outfits like these:

They should loosen up a bit. There is more to life than being an Islamic activist and if their plan is to turn Egypt into an Islamic state, why not have fun along the way? Are joints Haram?

Santa's heat problem

Could Santa Claus possibly deliver gifts to all the world’s good children – and still remain within the laws of physics? To deliver gifts to all who deserve them, Santa would need to move so fast that he would vaporise due to air resistance, be torn to pieces by gravitational forces or suffer other terrible fates we wouldn’t wish for Santa Claus, but according to one scientist, "Santa has an ion-shield of charged particles, held together by a magnetic field, surrounding his entire sleigh. This is how he solves the heat problem."

Muslim Brotherhood

The Muslim Brotherhood group is on the rise in Egypt. After making significant wins in last year's parliamentary elections, they have been flexing their muscles on issues like the veil, paramilitary parades and talk of possessing an armed militia. It is a fact that they constitute the only real opposition force in Egypt (the rest are dick heads), but it beggars belief that some people are still giving them the benefit of the doubt and are hoping that they would one day "play democracy" with everybody else.

This is just plain bullshit. The group's founder, Hassan Al Banna shunned the idea of multi paty politics and democracy. Their prominent thinker and theorist, Sayed Kotb thought that the Egyptian state and society is apostate. The former head of the group, Mustafa Mash'hour, once said that disagreeing with the group is tantamount to disageeing with god and the prophet of Islam. The current head, Mahdi Akef said the group has an armed militia. In addition, they refuse the notion of secularism. A secular is a kafir son of a bitch who will burn in hell and separating state and religion is out of the question for them.

It is easy therefore to see where they are heading. An Islamic state.

Muslim Brothers, FUCK YOU.

Competitive peeing

When I was at school kids would compete to outdo each other by peeing ever higher up a wall. It seems rediculous, but at the time it really mattered who could pee higher.

I remembered this when I saw how Egyptian officials and judges have been competing lately on who can be the stupidest*. There has been some really first class stupidity demonstrated lately. I wonder who scored higher? The asshole dealing with the Bahai case or with the detained blogger Kareem Amer or with the Muslim Brothers or the Farouk Hosni veil crisis. Did I miss anybody? I'm sure I did.

* I should say most stupid rather than stupidest, but google apparently has more hits for stupidest than most stupid and as long as we are talking about Egyptian officials then WTF.

Bahais

Egyptian legal authorities banned the right of Bahais to state their religion on official documents. The supreme administrative court, which made the ruling, also described Bahais as "pro-Israeli apostates."

I honestly didn't know anything about Bahais and I never met one. So I tried to find out a bit about them:

Bahais believe that people of all religions worship one god, and that their prophet, Bahaullah was one in a succession of prophets including Abraham, Moses, Buddha, Jesus, and Muhammad, serving the same god. Their central mission is to bring peace to the world, and unite people of different religions and races. The faith calls for full equality between the sexes, and an end to extremes of wealth and poverty. There are five million Bahais in 188 countries and the faith holds scientific endevour in high regard.

Seems to me like a peaceful religion that cannot be seen as a threat to anyone. They are very unlikely to be engaged in acts of terror or aggression. I think discriminating against them this way is a disgrace.

No Torture in Egypt

A man deported from Canada to Egypt in September was reportedly tortured by authorities. The unidentified man went to Canada in 2002 seeking asylum. He reportedly made a refugee claim, alleging he was persecuted in his home country, but was deported in September. The man says he suffered injuries inflicted by Egyptian authorities during interrogations. He claims he was shocked, doused with water and beaten. Egypt's ambassador to Canada says no one is persecuted and torture is a very serious crime, which no one condones.

No comment.

Official media and multiple orgasms

This is the kind of picture of Hosni Mubarak used in official Egyptian newspapers:



While in fact he looks more like this:



The official Egyptian media is therefore as credible as the multiple orgasms of a call girl.

The father's guide to bluffing your way out of your kids questions

Parents fear the day when their kids questions start to progress from "where does santa come from?" to "where did I come from?"

Here's a piece of valuable advice. Ignore all that politicaly correct bullshit from child psychologists about being frank and honest with your children, and simply bluff your way out of embarassment.

Scrotum? That's a small planet near Uranus. Diaphragm? Simple, it's a geometric figure. And Herpes was a Greek god. A fallopian tube is part of the TV set and anus is the Latin word for "year". Testicles are found on an octopus, Phallus was a city on the Nile, masturbate is used to catch large fish, vagina is a medical term used to describe heart trouble, and Kos is a Greek island.

Negative Picture

Muslim Brotherhood students at Al-Azhar University have apologized for the "negative picture" that resulted from their wearing paramilitary uniforms on campus

How nice of them... but I'm not convinced. The negative picture I have in my mind of them is that of a bunch of fundumentalists who want to turn Egypt into an Islamic state. Do I hear any apology for this?

Even terrorists must not be tortured

According to this Human Rights Watch has asked President Husni Mubarak to immediately order a retrial for three men convicted of playing a role in the October 2004 terrorist attacks in Sinai resort town of Taba. The three men were sentenced to death but HRW says that serious allegations of torture and forced confessions, as well as prolonged incommunicado detention and lack of consultation with counsel, raise significant doubts about the fairness of the trial.

The Egyptian government must learn how to be civilized an what a fair trial means. These guys may be terrorists and may be guilty, but if you torture the shit out of them and deny them their rights then the whole trial becomes null and void. You can't do this kind of shit in the fucking 21st century and expect to get away with it.

Egyptians are being poisoned

Half a million Cairenes will develop potentially fatal lung diseases and cancers in the next 5–25 years as a result of the “black cloud.” Why can’t the state get a grip on this seven-year-old phenomenon? The answer is simple. Because our Septuagenarian president won't be around when the shit hits the fan, so they'll continue to blame it on the rice farmers

What are the muslim brothers up to?

About 50 Muslim Brotherhood student members staged a military-style parade in black uniform and balaklavas during a protest Sunday by hundreds of Broterhood supporters at the Al-Azhar Islamic University campus. A security official told The Associated Press that the police had opened an investigation into whether the group has set up a militia. A Muslim Brotherhood leader denied any military training or setting an armed wing."We have no militia and no military wing," Mohammad Seyed Habib, the group's deputy leader, told the AP. This move on the Muslim Brothers side sparked concern in the government and among liberal opposition groups that the brothers are trying to undermine the authority of the state and encite violence.

Tragic

A fifty year old man in Jordan shot and killed his daughter and her would-be fiancé because of rumours that the young couple had engaged in premarital sex.

The killer father shot the couple after his wife informed him she had heard from neighbours that her daughter, 21, and her boyfriend, 23, were having a sex.

He arranged to get the boyfriend and his family to come to his home by pretending that he had finally agreed to their engagement after refusing several times in the past. He asked the boyfriend to follow him to the room where his daughter was and allegedly took out a gun and fired 14 rounds at the couple.

A medical report issued by the National Institute of Forensic Medicine indicated that the female victim was a virgin. This is the 15th honor killing in Jordan this year.

Very Cheeky

I stumbled on this in youtube. Someone working in the the Bank of Riyadh and who has access to clients accounts, decided to disclose the details of an account that belongs to a member of the Saudi royal family, Prince Abdel Aziz Bin Fahd Al Saud. This is the 34 year old son of the late king Fahd. Daddy appointed him as minister without portfilio (Iam sure he deserves the post). The balance on his bank account is 487,500,000.00 :)
I dont know if this is riyals or dollars or euros, but it's serious cash.

Veils are a bad idea

The Egyptian blogger Wael Abbas published a link from Youtube of Saudi youth sexually harrassing two girls wearing the full veil (the niqab). It appears from the audio that one of the girls is Egyptian and the other is Sudanese. They were probably going home after finishing work.

Isn't the veil supposed to protect women by making them appear sexless???

So how come that in Saudi Arabia (the cradle of Islam) the veil isn't having that effect?? What do they have to wear then, full body armour??

The veil has failed miserably I think

Watch that video

I rest my case.

If you don't pray... you'll be beheaded

I almost fell off my chair when I read this. THIS IS REAL!!!

Yes... If you don't pray five times a day in a southern Somalia town you will be beheaded. An official said that the edict will be implemented in three days. Shops, tea houses and other public places in Bulo Burto, about 200 kilometers (124 miles) northeast of the capital, Mogadishu, should be closed during prayer time and no one should be on the streets, said Sheik Hussein Barre Rage, the chairman of the town's Islamic court. His court is part of a network backed by armed militiamen that has taken control of much of southern Somalia in recent months.

Sheik Hussein Barre Rage... FUCK YOU.

Those who do not follow the prayer edict after three days have elapsed, "will definitely be beheaded according to Islamic law," Rage told The Associated Press by phone. "As Muslims we should practice Islam fully, not in part, and that is what our religion enjoins us to do." He said the edict, which covered only Bulo Burto, was being announced over loudspeakers throughout the town. Some seriously mad things have been happening in Somalia recently such as: public executions, floggings of people convicted of smoking tobacco, bans on women swimming in public beaches and on the sale and chewing of khat. BTW, I tried khat once. It is good stuff and should never be banned.

Saudis call this justice

A Pakistani man and woman convicted of drug smuggling were beheaded with a sword on Wednesday in the Saudi Red Sea city of Jeddah click here and see how the Saudi news agency reported this. Even the way they write their news is cruel. Mohammed Rafiq Miyassid and his daughter Abajan Mohammed Rafiq were caught bringing heroin into Saudi Arabia in their stomachs (they were mules... shit). 34 people have been executed in Saudi Arabia this year, At least 83 in 2005 and 35 the year before. Executions are carried out in public and parents take their children to watch. Death penalty is applied for murder, rape, apostasy, armed robbery and drug trafficking.

LOL

Malaysian Dick Heads Ban Sexy Women

What happens when you put dick heads in charge of your city?

The ban sexy women!

This sounds like a bad joke but it isn't according to this.

Authorities in a Malaysian city have warned waitresses and female staff of retail outlets that they face a US$138 fine if they wear revealing and tight fitting clothes.

The Kota Baru town's municipal council has said it will no longer tolerate indecent dressing and will begin enforcing an existing Islamic law that prohibits indecent dressing, The Star newspaper said.

Kota Baru is the capital of the northeastern Kelantan state, the only Malaysian state to be ruled by an opposition Islamic fundamentalist party. All other Malaysian states are governed by the secular United Malays National Organization and its allies.

The government in Kelantan imposes Islamic regulations such as separate check out counters for men and women at supermarkets

The bylaw on proper feminine attire prohibits Muslim and non-Muslim women from wearing body hugging outfits, blouses that show the navel, see-through blouses, miniskirts and tight pants.

And here is the best bit: "We apologize to non-Muslims if this comes across as harsh but we must respect our Asian culture and religion in public," State local government committee chairman Takiyuddin Hassan was quoted as saying.

I don't think it's harsh. I think it's moronic.

Takiyuddin Hassan, FUCK YOU.

You think this might happen in Egypt one day? One thing for sure, there is no shortage of dick heads in Egypt who would LOVE to enforce this law.

Maybe Egyptian Police Are Not Completely Useless

Egyptian police have arrested an American, 11 Europeans and several others from Arab countries for allegedly plotting terrorist attacks in Middle Eastern countries including Iraq, the Interior Ministry said on Monday.


If this is true, then maybe the Egyptian police are not completely useless. They should do more of that and stop arresting bloggers and torturing people.

Free Kareem Amer

It's been almost a month since the Egyptian authorities arrested the young Egyptian blogger Kareem Amer on the 6th of November and locked him up for blogging.

The irony is that one of the charges that he faces is "harming the reputation of Egypt", but nothing that he ever wrote has harmed the reputation of Egypt as much as the fact that he is arrested for blogging.

Which makes me suspect that the authorities are not really interested in the country's reputation